Time flies when you are having fun being a mom. My daughter turned 18 months old yesterday and I still cannot believe how fast time is going by. I really do feel like she was born only a few months ago, but she is in fact a toddler now. She is almost walking (some of you know about her occupational therapy she gets a few times a month.) I actually spoke to her OT and they said they might be done soon with her, because once she is walking, they feel she is catching up pretty fast now!
I am getting really excited because Lillian is at the stage of ‘walking’ where she is holding on to anything to stand but she won’t let go yet. She will stand up and stand still, but no actual walking. But I can tell she is very close.
Ever since we got a real diagnosis for her food allergies, I feel better about feeding her new things. Because now her doctors know I am not crazy. She has a real allergy. I feel some what validated.
This month is going to be hard, my son is on his trip to see his father in Indiana, and this will be Lillian’s second summer with out her brother around. I think she might actually notice him missing this year, unlike last year. She even knows when the grandmother clock is going to gong, she usually will announce it to me. She is very smart, I cannot wait to see what kind of little kid she will become.
Today I got a hair cut for the first time in 2 years. I cannot believe it took me this long, but I used to work full time, I have two kids, both of which have some sort of special needs, at different times. And up until recently, I just haven’t made time for myself. So I went and got my hair clipped about 4 to 5 inches!
I don’t mind that it is shorter. I like that it feels HEALTHY. I will also post photos soon on twitter of my new hair color. It’s not “drastic” but its different, than the color above. (Yes I dyed my hair tonight as well!)
I wanted to post photos tonight but its the kind of hair color that shows up much better in the sun. My hair is already pretty dark and the photos I took in the bathroom do not do the hair dye justice. So I will figure something out and post to twitter later today or tomorrow. I might do another dye to make it brighter if I don’t think its bright enough in the sun.
I am not bleaching my hair to color it by the way. I have done that in the past and I feel that with my curls, it ruined my hair. I am just trying to add a different shade to my already dark brown hair. And I let my husband pick out the color at the store the other day, he did a decent job at it I must say. He knows I am trying to make some self improvements, to be happier. I used to do this sort of stuff all the time, but since about 7 years ago, things just got to be too much.
I want to change that.
I even mentioned to him that I might want a new tattoo. I have some ideas but I might be going to twitter to see if anyone there that follows me might be able to help me find the perfect addition to my current tattoos. This won’t be something I get soon, this is a project that I will be working on to find the perfect addition to my two tattoos on my back. I am not the type of person to get tattoos everywhere of random things, all of my tattoos have meanings. Both are in remembrance of my uncles, both of which have significance in my life.
My uncle June Bug (nick name), his real name is Enrique, was murdered in 1999. I remember him as being a very gentle and polite man. His tattoo was my first, its a kokopelli. I am native american and he gave me a necklace the last time I saw him a live of a kokopelli (and yes I know what the kokopelli stands for.) My other uncle passed away a few years ago and I will admit I didnt know him well. I got to know him through his journals after he died. I worked at the hospital he passed away at, and I checked on him for family by visiting him during my lunch times for a few weeks/months.
Eventually my family called me and told me hospice said he was dying, I was the only person close enough to make it to him. I held his hand as he died. He had tattoos of some butterflies on his chest. So I added some butterflies to my back for him. I would like my next tattoo to represent my struggles with my depression, I want to document how strong I can be.
But I am having a hard time actually picking something, and a body part to put it on. So I will reach out on twitter and here for some advice soon.
As I said earlier, I am working on myself. I have let too many people treat me like crap for too long. I never used to do that. So I am going to be myself again. I can’t always fit in. And I honestly don’t want to anymore. I love my kids and my husband, and I feel closer than ever to my husband after a bunch of junk happened recently.
I think we needed this change in life. I have connected to some other family members recently and I feel so happy to have such good support online, via the bloggess tribe, my twitter tribe, my besties from NJ, my family, and my husband and kids.
Thank you all for the support.